HOW TO BLOW GOATS

¡¡¡ Become An Expert Goat-Blower In The Comfort Of Your Own Home !!!

Justin B Rye [MAIL] 01-Apr-98

[Fig vii - Decorating Your Goat]
Have you ever wanted to be like Bill Gates, or the Spice Girls, or Uri Geller?  Well, now you can!  Think about it - what do all these people have in common?  That's right - they all blow goats!  And now, so can you thanks to the JBR® Goat-Blowing DIY Kit!!
To reserve your own Goat-Blowing DIY Kit for a new all-time low cost of only 97 Icelandic Yen (plus I¥371.51 carriage, I¥85.18 registration fee and I¥106.11 sales tax) simply fill in this form:
Full Name:
Address:
Zip Code: IQ: Shoe Size:
Age: <14 15-18 19-65 65-80 >80
Credit Details:
AOL Password: Standard Civil Rights Waiver:
...and it to sucker@goat.com
Note: kit contains instruction manual and licence agreement only - newspapers, wallpaper paste, brush, paints, pin, and hardboiled goat not included.  Offer subject to availability; please allow a minimum of six months for delivery.  Contents may settle during transit.
Offer Must End Soon!
This offer includes a free lifetime subscription to the Spammomatix Product News Service, bringing you all the latest commercial information about related offers such as the following:
  • How to blow your own trumpet!
  • How to blow safes!
  • How to blow a fortune!
  • How to blow a gasket!
  • How to blow your mind!
  • How to blow bubbles!
    (recommended by Michael Jackson)
For no extra fee, we can now offer clients the extra benefit of automatic registration with Goat Blowers Anonymous, experts in catering for the requirements of capriflation enthusiasts everywhere.
[GBA Bannervert]